Normalization

I volunteer at a place that provides a listening ear for LGBTQ youth, and the other day I was thinking about how a lot of the issues these youth are concerned about can be grouped into two categories.

1. People who are scared of coming out because their peers/family/religion, etc. might not be supportive of them (to put it lightly, as some of them face ostracism or being kicked out);

2. People who are concerned that what they're doing (e.g. cross-dressing, having sex with men and liking it, etc.) is wrong. In a way, these folks are easier to deal with, because all they really need to be told is that it's NORMAL.

Conclusions I've made from this: there needs to be alot more public awareness about sexuality. I'm reminded of the debate regarding the now-scrapped sex ed curriculum proposed by Premier Dalton McGuinty. To all the naysayers who effectively killed this proposal: I am sorry if you think the proposed knowledge would corrupt your child. I understand that you have the child's best interests at heart. BUT here's the thing: you can't stop people from being gay, liking cross-dressing, or being a bottom. It's who they are, and if they don't realize that it's totally normal and fine to feel that way, well, that can mess someone up. I've found that one of the biggest steps of the coming out process is coming out to oneself, and if you cant accept yourself for who you are, well, a lot of pretty horrible feelings can be dredged up. I've been there. So tell me, is THAT in my best interests?

Catholic Schools: A Rude Awakening

The Halton Catholic District School Board (HCDSB) recently banned Gay-Straight Alliances (GSAs) because they go against Catholic ideology. In an article in Xtra!, the board’s chairperson justified this ban by adding, “We don’t have Nazi groups either.” I’m sorry – DID SHE JUST COMPARE QUEERS TO NAZIS???

However, it is not that sentence in particular with which I take issue but rather the idea behind it. Frankly, I am disappointed in the Catholic school board. In the interest of full disclosure, I will say that I attended Catholic school from K-12, though not in the Halton district, and, while I was raised Catholic, I don’t consider myself to be one. Growing up, I always knew that the Catholic Church was not a fan of queers (the whole marriage-is-between-a-man-and-a-woman thing, ya know?), but none of their stances had really ever affected me personally. (Example: Oh, you say I can’t marry a same-sex partner? Well, I live in Canada, so I actually can. Ha!) Like, the Pope would sit there in Vatican City making decrees and I could decide whether or not I wanted to follow them. But when a school board – the place you go every single day to be educated and become a worldly citizen – places an outright ban on GSAs, that’s something that can’t be ignored because the consequences are immediate.

I’ve always held this ideal that in the school system the students’ well-being should be Priority Number One. In a perfect school system, if a gay kid was being bullied and the presence of a GSA could help him out, then the GSA would be there. End of story. A kid’s well-being should take precedent over things like political agendas or belief systems, any day. So when GSAs are banned, in my mind the meaning behind the message is twofold: the less-than-groundbreaking A) Being queer is unacceptable [so what else is new?], and the infinitely-more-unsettling B) Even if you are queer, we won’t help you out.

It’s a rude awakening for someone like myself, who has always defended Catholic schools – even in queer circles where Catholic-bashing functions as an icebreaker (I’m not joking. It’s happened to me at least twice) – because my experience wasn’t like that. The circumstances leading up to me rejecting the Catholic faith were multi-dimensional, but my reevaluation of the Catholic school board is hinging on this singular incident, due to its vast repercussions. I now have to face that voice in my head, quietly insisting, “Maybe they’re right.” A rude awakening indeed. Sign the petition here!